En cinématographe, M'sieur et Madam'Durand
Avaient tous deux des goûts très différents.
Madam', foll' de terreur, préférait les gangsters
Et lui des films documentaires.
Aussi, tous les jeudis,
lorsque tombait la nuit,
Ils partaient enchantés
Vers leur spécialité.
{Le film de Madame Durand, un film de gangster.}
"T'as eu tort, Johny, pour fifty box's seul'ment.
T'as eu tort de buter ta grand-maman.
Planqu'ton gun, Johny, v'là l'Shériff qui vient.
C'est trop tard Johny, t'es fait comm'un chien."
Et pendant qu'Madam'Durand frémissant' voyait tout ça,
Son époux écoutait dans un autre cinéma.
{Le film de Monsieur Durand, un film documentaire.}
La Tilderette est un oiseau futile et volage. Dès les pre-
miers beaux jours, elle ne se soucie plus de loger dans la
petite hutte de paillettes qu'elle a tristement brodée tout
l'hiver. Bien au contraire, elle pond, à présent, ses œufs à
l'extérieur. Remarquez combien les œufs de la Tilderette
ressemblent à nos crottes de mouche...
"T'as eu tort, Johny pour fifty box's seul'ment..."
Reprenait l'ciné d'mam'Durand !
Un soir, Monsieur Durand vint chercher son épous',
Son film ayant fini vers onze heur's douz'
Puis, pour rentrer chez eux, ils vont, je n'sais pourquoi,
Par un'rue mal famée et hop-là !
Quatr' monte-en-l'air surgirent
"Ton fric ! Aboule ou j'tire !"
Soudain un coup partit,
Et l'pauvre homm'entendit !
"T'as eu tort, Bébert, pour cinquant'ball's seul'ment,
T'as eu tort d'buter Madam'Durand.
Planqu'ton Colt, Bébert.
V'là la Rouss' qui vient.
C'est trop tard, Bébert, t'es fait comm'un chien."
Et pendant qu'Monsieur Durand perdu voyait tout ça,
Il entendait encore le Speaker du cinéma
Oui, le speaker de son film documentaire
Qui se gargarisait...
Les charmantes ouvrières des usines Patroubec Haute-
Vendée} font d'abord tremper les graines de cachemin
dans une solution de citrouille et de bicarbonate. Puis on
plie ce qu'on appelle vulgairement la barbe dans des
petites boîtes en carton qui ressemblent étrangement à nos
boîtes à gâteaux. Ensuite, ce sera le triage sévère, puis
l'échelonnage et enfin l'échantillonnage...
T'as eu tort Bébert pour cinquant' ball's seul'ment,
Reprenaient en cœur les agents !
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