Spoken:
Lady:
If it's not asking too much,
Sung:
For our information
Just for illustration
Tell us how you intend to run the nation
Rufus T. Firefly:
These are the laws of my administration
No one's allowed to smoke
Or tell a dirty joke
And whistling is forbidden
Chorus:
We're not allowed to tell a dirty joke
Hail, hail Freedonia
Rufus:
If chewing gum is chewed
The chewer is pursued
And in the hooscall hidden
Chorus:
If we choose to chew we'll be pursued
Rufus:
If any form of pleasure is exibited
Report to me and it will be prohibited
I'll put my foot down, so shall it be
This is the land of the free
The last man nearly ruined this place
He didn't know what to do with it
If you think this country's bad off now,
Just wait 'til I get through with it
The country's taxes must be fixed
And I know what to do with it
If you think you're paying too much now
Just wait till I get throught with it
*whistle*
I will not stand for anything that's crooked or unfair
I'm strictly on the upper knot, so everyone beware
If any man's caught taking graft, and I don't get my share
We stand'im up against the wall and pop! Goes the weasel
Chorus:
So everyone beware, you're stricken or unfair
-------unless he gets his share
Rufus:
If any man should come between a husband and his bride
We'll find out which one she prefers by letting her decide
If she prefers the other man, the husband steps outside
We stand him up against the wall and pop! Goes the weasel
Chorus:
The husband steps outside, relinquishes his bride
They stand him up against the wall and take him for white
Groucho Marx, born Julius Henry Marx (1890-1977), was an American actor, comedian, writer, and television host. The third of the five Marx Brothers, Groucho began his career in vaudeville at the turn of the 20th century, performing with his brothers in theaters across the United States. It was during this period that he honed his comedic style, characterized by rapid-fire delivery, witty one-liners, and wordplay, often delivered with a mischievous irreverence towards authority and a disdain for social conventions. International fame came with the Marx Brothers' films of the 1930s, such as *Duck Soup* (1933) and *A Night at the Opera* (1935), where Groucho played sarcastic and irreverent characters that became iconic. In addition to his film career, Groucho was also a successful television host with the program *You Bet Your Life*. Groucho Marx is considered one of the greatest American comedians of all time, renowned for his sharp wit, biting irony, and ability to make audiences laugh through his brilliant quips.
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