Je m'réveille en sursaut
J'ai failli m'étouffer
J'ai de l'omelette au vin colée sur l'oreiller
Mes draps sont inondés ça remugle sévère
C'est plus une carte de France c'est une planisphère
Je file à la salle d'eau pour me désencrasser
Dans la baignoire qu'est bouchée depuis l'an dernier
Miracle il y a d'l'eau propre tout au fond des waters
Tout va bien ce matin j'ai d'quoi remplir ma cafetière
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
Je sens pas bon
Même pour un garçon
Je m'sens un peu malade j'ai du mal à digérer
Il m'faut un déjeuner pour me remettre sur pied
Le pain moisi contient de très bonne bactérie
Plus on mange pourri et plus vite on guérit
Une tartine de beurre rance n'a jamais tué personne
Mon verre de lait pétille il attaque même le bacon
J'aime pas la viande qui pique et pour c'qu'est des microbes
Une bonne dose de Harpic ca tue Creutzfeldt-Jakob
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
Je sens pas bon
Même pour un garçon
Je m'habille en vitesse
Faut qu'je file au boulot
Mon slip me colle aux fesses
Je l'chang'rais pas de sitôt
Aujourd'hui c'est spécial
J'choisis bien mes vêtements
SI je change pas de chaussettes
C'est le licensciement
Ca m'enbêterais un peu
Car je suis très amoureux
D'une charmante collègue
Qui m'aime aussi un peu
Elle m'drague comme une malade
Pendant toute la journée
'Fin quand j'dit comme une malade
C'est qu'elle est condamnée
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
J'suis saa...aaa...aaa...ale
J'suis pas gentil
Oh non je pète au lit
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