[Interloc'ter:]
Ladies and gentlemen, be seated
Mister Bones, Mister Bones
How do you feel, Mister Bones?
[Bones:]
Rattlin'!
[Interloc'ter:]
Mister Bones feels rattlin'!
Ha, ha, ha, ha, that's a good one
Tell a little story, Mister Bones
[Chorus:]
Tell a little story, Mister Bones
[Bones:]
How can you keep an angry dog from biting you on Monday?
[Interloc'ter:]
That joke is old, the answer is to kill the dog on Sunday
[Bones:]That's not the way to keep a dog from biting you on Monday
[Interloc'ter:]
How would you bring the thing about?
[Bones:]
Have the doggie's teeth pulled out!
[Interloc'ter:]
Oh, Mister Bones, that's terrible!
[Chorus:]
Yes, Mister Bones, that's terrible!
[Interloc'ter:]
And now we'll hear the ballad singer's pet
A song we'll ne'er forget
By the barnyard quartette
[Quartette:]
Yes, my darling, you shall be, shall be
Always young and fair to me
That's a song that never will grow old
"Silver threads among the gold"
[Tambo:]
Mister Interloc'ter
[Interloc'ter:]
What is wrong with you?
[Tambo:]
I know of a doctor
[Interloc'ter:]
Tell about him, do
[Tambo:]
Sad to say, one day he fell
Right into a great big well
[Interloc'ter:]
That's too bad
[Tambo:]
It serves him right
[Interloc'ter:]
Why speak in such a tone?
[Tambo:]
He should have attended to the sick
And let the well alone
[Quartette:]
That's a joke that was told
By the minstrel men we miss
When Georgie Primrose used to sing
And dance to a song like this
Irving Berlin, born Izrail' Moiseevic Bejlin (1888-1989), was one of the most influential American composers of the 20th century. Born in Temesvár, Romania, to a Jewish family, he moved to the United States at the age of five. He began his career as a singer and pianist in New York clubs, writing his first songs while working as a waiter. In 1911, he achieved his first success with "Alexander's Ragtime Band", which became a national anthem during World War I. Berlin composed hundreds of songs, including "White Christmas", "God Bless America" and "This Is a Lovely Day". His works are characterized by catchy melodies, simple but effective lyrics and a deep understanding of American popular taste. Berlin won numerous awards, including an honorary Oscar in 1971. His music continues to be performed and enjoyed worldwide.
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