tonight i'm posed and popping like a peacock.
i'm pressing flesh.
i'm smiling big.
my spinning head sings "stop, just stop." 'cause what used to calm me down just rips my life to ribbons now.
so i keep smiling.
i find my window and quick cut out.
these days my hangman's hunger makes my gut kick.
my sleeping mind could map it blind: a flask, a key, a bag, a fifth.
i try to will myself away while shouting habits plead their case.
so when the sun seers through my eyes, a beggar's brain can't compromise.
i splash cold water.
i draw the curtains.
i stay inside.
and i can't say that it's a sickness, more like a stranger i ask in and later realize it was a strangler slipping nooses in my den.
but i was lonely, so i asked him, "could you tie that one on me?" it wasn't his fault.
i was eager and i was weak.
so as i inched towards resolution, yeah, i'm not sure which life feels right.
no narrow noose or the wading water will hang in hex or open eyes.
i know my brother, he went one way and at the fork i heard him say, "don't you follow.
don't go making my mistakes." and i realized what he meant: don't kill yourself to raise the dead.
it never works.
you'll only end up joining them.
it never works.
you'll only end up joining them.
Kevin Devine is an American songwriter and musician from Brooklyn, New York. Known for alternately introspective and political lyrics paired with melodic acoustic guitar tunes. His influences include Neutral Milk Hotel, Bob Dylan, Elliott Smith, Pavement, and Nirvana, among others. Devine has released a prolific discography of studio albums, EPs, and singles, often characterized by an indie folk approach with elements of alternative rock. Some of his most representative tracks include "The Ballad of the Brokenhearted", "I'm Not a Hero", and "You Can't Save Me".
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