I really was born at 9:29 AM on 9/29
You think I'm lying but I'm not, I'm being dead serious
Okay, I'll prove it
Well who am I, I'm almost 25
Can't remember half the time that I've been alive
'Cause half was in a cheap apartment, and half was on the Eastside
They said don't meet your heroes, they're all fuckin' weirdos
And God knows that they were right
Because nobody loves you, they just try to fuck you, then put you on a feature on the B-Side
And who do you call when it's late at night?
When the headlines just don't paint the picture right
When you look at yourself on a screen and say "Oh my God, there's no way that's me"
And I quit smoking, well recently I tried
And I bought another house, and I never go outside
And I remember this girl with pink hair in Detroit, well, she told me
She said, "Ashley, what you've gotta promise us that you won't die, 'cause we need you"
And honestly, I think that she lied
I remember the names of every single kid I've met
But I forget half the people who I've gotten in bed
I've stared at the sky in Milwaukee
And hoped that my father would finally call me
And it's just these things that I'm thinkin' for hours
And I'm picking my hair out in clumps in the shower
Lost the love of my life to an ivory powder
But then I realized that I'm no higher power
But I wasn't in love then, and I'm still not now
And I'm so happy I figured that out
I've got a long way to go until self-preservation
Think my moral compass is on a vacation
And I can't believe I still feed my fucking temptation
And I'm still looking for my salvation
Soft and slow, watch the minutes go
Count out loud, so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself
Watch the minutes go
Count out loud, so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself
I think I have a confession to make (So we know you don't)
It's good to see that I was really born at 9:26
Saw my birth certificate, I'm a liar
And I'm a fucking liar
Soft and slow, watch the minutes go
Count out loud, so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself
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