I finished my lunch early
Had a lot of time to blow
Started thinking about surprising you
At your job wearing nothing under my raincoat
I could only imagine what you'd do
And when I walked through the door
What did I see?
Skanky old Darlene with her hands all over Gene
Oh, Lord, she done got the better half of me
I shot her in her boom-boom, and I shot Gene in his knees
She's bleeding out, and he's running now
Calling the police
I'll gladly go to jail for shooting Darlene and Gene
She used to be my best friend, joined at the hip
We spent so much time together
We started dressing, smelling, even talking alike
Momma, I sure should've known better
And when I walked through the door
What did I see?
Skanky old Darlene with her hands all over Gene
Oh, Lord, she done got the better half of me
I shot her in her boom-boom, and I shot Gene in his knees
She's bleeding out, and he's running now
Calling the police
I'll gladly go to jail for shooting Darlene and Gene
Oh, yeah
When I walked through the door
What did I see?
Skanky old Darlene with her hands all over Gene
Oh, Lord, she done got the better half of me
I shot her in her boom-boom, and I shot Gene in his knees
She's bleeding out, and he's running now
Calling the police
I'll gladly go to jail for shooting Darlene and Gene
Oh, yeah
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