Reinhard Mey

Lyrics Die heisse schlacht am kalten büffet Reinhard Mey

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Die heisse schlacht am kalten büffet


Gemurmel dröhnt drohend wie Trommelklang, gleich stürzt eine ganze Armee,
die Treppe herauf, und die Flure entlang, dort steht das kalte Buffet.
Zunächt regiert noch die Hinterlist, doch bald schon brutale Gewalt,
da spießt man, was aufzuspießen ist, die Faust um die Gabel geballt.
Mit feurigem Blick und mit Schaum vor dem Mund kämpft jeder für sich allein,
und schiebt sich in seinen gefräßigen Schlund, was immer hineinpaßt, hinein.

Bei der heißen Schlacht am kalten Buffet, da zählt der Mann noch als Mann,
und Aug' in Auge, Aspik und Gelee, hier zeigt sich, wer kämpfen kann, hurra!
Hier zeigt sich wer kämpfen kann.

Da blitzen die Messer, da prallt das Geschirr mit elementarer Wucht.
auf Köpfe und Leiber, und aus dem Gewirr, versucht ein Kellner die Flucht.
Ein paar Veteranen im Hintergrund tragen Narben auf Stirn und Gesicht,
quer über die Nase und rings um den Mund, wohin halt die Gabel sticht.
Ein tosendes Schmatzen erfüllet den Raum, es rülpst und es grunzt und es quiekt.
Fast hört man des Kellners Hilferuf kaum, der machtlos am Boden liegt.

Bei der heißen Schlacht...

Da braust es noch einmal wie ein Orkan, ein Recke mit Übergewicht
wirft sich auf's Buffet im Größenwahn, worauf es dann donnernd zerbricht.
Nur leises Verdauen dringt noch an das Ohr, das Schlachtfeld wird nach und nach still.

Aus Trümmern sieht angstvoll ein Kellner hervor, der längst nicht mehr fliehen will.
Eine Dame träumt lächelnd vom Heldentod, gebettet in Kaviar und Sekt,
derweil sie, was übrigzubleiben droht, blitzschnell in die Handtasche steckt.

Das war die Schlacht am kalten Buffet, von fern tönt das Rückzugssignal.
Viel Feind, viel Ehr' und viel Frikassee, Na denn: "Prost" bis zum nächsten Mal, hurra!
Na denn: "Prost" bis zum nächsten Mal!

Das war die Schlacht am kalten Buffet, und von dem vereinnahmten Geld
gehn zehn Prozent, welch noble Idee, als Spende an "Brot für die Welt", hurra!
Als Spende an "Brot für die Welt".

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