Il se fiche pas mal
de la jolie blondinette
qui le regarde depuis des mois
derrière ses lunettes
elle lui fait de l'oeil
depuis son fauteil
assise dans le bureau d'acceuil
il part comme un voleur
se cache sous le photocopieur
et rampe le soir
jusqu'à l'ascenseur
Il veut une poupée
elue produit de l'année
sans colorant, sans conservateur
zéro pour cent de matière grasse
et sans parfum synthétique
sabs additif ni trace
de manipulation génétique
avec mention sur l'emballage
juste vingt ans d'âge
elle prend chaque jour
la même voiture de tête
du métro et quand il entre
elle le guette
elle sort ses atouts
joue le tout pour le tout
du make-up, du gloss, des bijoux
discrètement il feint
le nez dans son quotidien
de ne pas voir ses appels
du pied et de la main
Il veut une poupée
reconnue saveur de l'année
pour montrer ses bienfaits naturels
sans composants artificiels
jolie poupée élevée en pleine air
au bon parfum de Provence
à l'inimitable savoir faire
pour ses cures de jouvence
à conserver de préférence
à l'abri de la concurrence
Et quand il se rend
le dimanche chez sa mère
qui recrute chaque semaine
des célibataires
il dit des jurons
tient des propos abscons
se donne des airs
de mauvais garçon
elles partent en furie
outrées, abasourdies
tandis qu'il se délecte
de sa comédie
Il veut une poupée
élue produit de l'année
sans abonnement
sans engagement
sans coupon remboursement
il veut le pack intégral
avec Alice, la femme fatale
soirs et week-ends
à temps complet
et puis peut-être du hors forfait
et comme le veut la tradition
le manuel d'utilisation
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