It could be seconds
It could be minutes
Or on a good day, maybe an hour after I awake
All my senses start to ache
Always the same strangling shame
Visited down upon my brain each morning
My soul is sick
A herring gull in an oil slick
I don't feel up to it
But we're off to an old pal's wedding in the lakes
Following a flask of coffee up blustery Catbells
We arrive late for the bird of prey display
An eagle-owl swoops an inch above the ducking guests
The feathered cleaver of its wing nears clouds of our breath
It tears apart the abandoned body of a mouse
And I feel nothing
Mountains of finger food
Flutes of fizz
Billowing bunting
My self-loathing is a purse full of bile
Whose drawstrings are those cheery smiles
"How have you been getting on?"
Sausage rolls and vol-au-vents
"What have you been up to?"
Tiny cheese scones
"Where are you living these days?"
Yellow crumbs on silver trays
Here comes the bride, all dressed in white
Wraith-like father at her side
To the strains of "All I Have to Do is Dream"
And a baby's bone-chilling scream
Waddling down the aisle comes a Golden Retriever
In a waistcoat and dicky bow
Golden rings dangling from a length of golden string
And a thread of jewels swaying to and fro
"I do, I do"
Words like tiny fish tossed about in a swell of fierce confetti
And the echoing of pre-recorded bells
You hook your arm in mine
And reel me gently back towards myself
But I feel nothing
The best man's speech
Is pretty much a bleak ham-fisted PowerPoint presentation
On the groom's former life
Of depravity and degradation
The dad dancing is in full swing
I'm at the buffet table
Hoovering up the last of the corn beef pie
I spot you chatting to some guy
I don't know who you are
Pile of sick on the bar
Polyester tie, Jägerbomb
Flashing lights, ladder tights, a nasty fight, karaoke
Is it me who butchers "My Heart Will Go On"
"Hey, let me out"
"Stop the car, I want to get out"
"Now wait, just calm down"
"Don't tell me to calm down"
"Please, just calm down"
I don't remember what we're even arguing about
But I feel something
The fog hanging over
Crummock Water
Is swelling with morning and curlews calling
I rub the rheum from my eyes
There must be a road nearby
Richard Dawson (born Colin Lionel Emm on February 13, 1932 in Stoke-on-Trent, England – died June 2, 2012 in Los Angeles, California) was a British-American actor and television host. Known for his appearances on the quiz show "Match Game", Dawson also played roles in films such as "The Dirty Dozen" (1967) and "Hogan's Heroes". Dawson was famous for his cheeky humor and the habit of kissing female contestants during his hosting stint on "Match Game". His television career spanned over 30 years, making him an iconic figure in American television of the 1970s and 1980s. Besides his television work, Dawson also acted in several films and TV series, demonstrating a wide range of talent. Some of his most representative works include "The Dirty Dozen", "Hogan's Heroes" and "Match Game".
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