"Howdy, folks. This next song is a story of a gal who just
couldn't choose between to fellers. One was about the nicest
guy you ever met, and the other one, well, he's kind of a
dick. Let's listen in as these boys settle it the only way
they know how; through singing. And a 1, and a 2... "
Make a choice - will it be
A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby
Or a guy like me?
I would comfort you when you're sad
Well, I would just leave you crying
I would protect you if a lion attacked you
Not trying to fuck with no lion
I would fight a man for your honor
I don't know no kung fu
I'd carry you across a muddy field
Bitch, these Jordans are new
Make a choice - will it be
A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby
Or a guy like me?
I would read you romantic poetry
I'll leave that shit on the shelf
My love making would be sweet and tender
This thing ain't sucking itself, no
I would take you to the finest restaurants
Here's an old Baby Ruth
I would tell you how pretty you look tonight
And I would tell you the truth
Make a choice - will it be
A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby
Or a guy like me?
But ba-by, baby
The choice is up to you
So pick me quickly
'Cause I've got shit to do
It's true dear, I do dear
I want you to be mine
But let's be clear here
I'm still not fighting no lion...
"Let's see what happens next...
Every day I'd say how much I love you
... I would not
I'd surprise you with gifts and flowers
I'd spend your money on pot, yeah
We would stay up all night just talking
I'd fall asleep when I came
I'd spell your name out with a thousand rose petals
I don't remember your name!
Make a choice - will it be
A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby
Or a guy like me?
Make a choice - will it be
A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby
Or a guy like me?
"See? I told you he was kind of a dick."
Stephen Andrew Lynch is an American singer-songwriter, comedian, and actor born in Boston in 1972. Known for his unique musical style that blends elements of folk, alternative rock, and cabaret, Lynch has gained a large fanbase thanks to his ironic songs, often self-deprecating, and his sharp lyrics that tackle themes like everyday life, human relationships, and the American experience. His musical career began in the 1990s with performances in Boston clubs before achieving national success with his debut album "A Little Bit of Everything" (2003). Lynch has released numerous other successful albums, including "The Music Is Dead" (2005), "The Best of Stephen Lynch" (2010) and "Up in the Air" (2018). Besides music, Lynch is also a successful actor with appearances in films and TV series like "Scrubs", "Boston Legal" and "The Big Bang Theory". Among his most famous songs are "I'm Gonna Be a Star", "The Ballad of the Broken Heart", "My Girlfriend's Boyfriend" and "You Can't Stop Me Now".
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