La nuit dernière j'ai fait un rêve épouvantable
J'étais une pomme de terre de St-Amable
Arraché à ma terre natale, déporté a Montréal
Un gros camion me dompe à station de télévision
Les caméras tournent
On fait jouer la p'tite toune
Puis le bourreau fait son apparition
Ah! Non! C'est Maman Dion!!
La cruche m'épluche
La torche m'écorche
Puis dans l'eau bouillante elle me plonge
Quel horrible songe
Je me réveille en sueurs
Je tremble de frayeur
Pour me remettre d'aplomb
Je me traîne jusqu'au salon
Transi, j'm'assis
J'appuie sur le piton
Mais là, malédiction!
Ah! Non! C'est Maman Dion!!
En proie à la folie
Je sors de mon logis
Et je me réfugie
Au dépanneur, au dépanneur
J'm'achète un Player's king size
Mais à coté de la caisse
Elle est là qui me guette
À la une d'Écho-Vedettes
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you Maman Dion!
Fuck tes recettes pis fuck tes chaudrons
Fuck you, , fuck you Maman Dion!
Maman Dion fait des tartes aux fraises
Elle fait des tartes aux franboises
Elle fait des tartes qui nous enchantent
Elle a même déjà fait une tarte qui chante
Je m'en vas chez ma mère
A me fait une tourtière
A me dit ça va être bon
J'ai pris ça à Maman Dion
Non! Non! NON!! Comment fuir Maman Dion?
Une seule solution semble sûre: la fuite
dans les drogues dures
Je cours chez mon pusher
J'passe devant l'club de danseurs
Qui c'est que j'vois faire la queue?
Maman Dion s'en va voir des queues
Je drope 2, 3 buvards, j'ai des hallucinations
Qui c'est que je vois dans mes cauchemars
Encore Maman Dion, non
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you Maman Dion!
Fuck tes recettes pis fuck tes chaudrons
Fuck you, , fuck you Maman Dion!
Si nous ne prenons pas nos précautions
Si nous ne faisons pas attention
Comme Maman Dion, Stéphane Dion, Lise Dion
ET Benoit Dion l'gars de son
Un jour nous serons tous des Dion
Il y aura Yasser Aradion, George W. Dion,
Luc Plamondion, Gérard Depardion
Lundion, mardion, mercredion
Nous danserons des rigodions
Jeudi, vendredi, samedion
Nous danserons le discodion
Nous ferons des manifestadions
Ou nous scanderons non, non, non
NON à la mondialisadion!
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