Heinz Rudolf Kunze

Lyrics Waschbär Heinz Rudolf Kunze

 509

Waschbär


Wurden Sie schon mal von einem Waschba?r vergewaltigt
zuerst u?berwiegt das blanke Entsetzen
dann bildet sich ein blitzeblankes Staunen heraus
und am Ende ist es scho?n
Waschba'ren sind ja sehr reinliche Tiere
selbstversta?ndlich verwenden sie Kondome
und sie machen das sehr geschickt
sie wickeln dich ein mit ihrer piepsigen Frage
na
du willst es doch auch
und ehe du etwas sagen kannst
während du noch um Fassung ringst
haben sie dich schon flachgelegt
hinterher liegen sie neben dir
und rauchen eine Mentholzigarette
sie sind ausgezeichnete Liebhaber
sie machen dich fix und fertig
und du kuschelst dich in dein Kissen
rollst dich durch und durch befriedigt ein
und schla?fst
wenn du aufwachst ist der Waschba?r natu?rlich u?ber alle Berge
hat deinen Kühlschrank leergefressen
und deine Heavy-Metal-CD's mitgehen lassenaber du kannst ihm einfach nicht bo'se sein
diesem kleinen Racker
mit seinem puschligen Riesenschwanz
hinten
gar keine Frage daß du von einer Anzeige absehen wirst
nicht etwa weil du dich scha?mst
sondern weil dir sowieso keiner glauben würde
stell dir mal vor du kommst auf ein Polizeirevier und sagst
ich mo?chte eine Vergewaltigung melden
und der Beamte bittet dich um eine Ta'terbeschreibung
und du sagst
nach allem was ich mir vom Biologieunterricht gemerkt habe
war es ein Waschba?r
der Polizist wird dich anschauen wie ein Neanderthaler
dem du weismachen willst
du habest einen Stein erfunden den man rollen kann
ja klar wird der Neanderthaler sagen
ja sicher
ja toll
und leichte Schläge auf den Hinterkopf
haben noch keinem geschadet
der Polizeibeamte dagegen wird gar nichts sagen
lächeln wird er
immerzu la?cheln
und nicken
und mo?glichst unauffa'llig eine Telefonnummer wa?hlen
und fu?r deine Sicherheitsverwahrung sorgen
nein nein nein
du wirst ihn nicht anzeigen den Waschba?r
denn insgeheim wu?nschst du dir ja
daß er wiederkommt
DIESER
TIGER

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