Last year I was anxious, this year I'm like double that
Pills, no more thanks but, they gave me a double pack
I'm here all cranked up, spine way down under wraps
I'm laid down on the gutter tracks
No safe ground on this fuckin' map, no
I'm tryna live just like you do
I know these tendencies are not usual
But everytime I get in my head, I find I'm runnin' in the red
I wanna be that little kid again, bruh
I see him walking on the range
He's 11 with these dreams of stalkin' fame with his game
At 37 I can't even board a plane the same
I wonder if my mind is truly gone for good
You can find me locked up in bed
Bill collectors say I'm in debt
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end
Had some money should've invest
Spent it all on stupid shit, yes
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end, yeah
Last year I was anxious, this year I'm like triple that
Pills, no more thanks but, they gave me a triple pack
I'm here all cranked up, spine way down cripple back
Now I can't stand with the fact
I'm manic panic in a second flat, I'm
Tryna live just like you do
I know these tendecies are not usual
But everytime I get in my head, I find I'm runnin' in the red
I wanna be that little kid again, bruh
I see him walkin' into frame
He's 17 with dreams of battlin' to gain his grain
At 37 I can't even take a bit of strain
I'm hopin' that my mind ain't truly gone for good
You can find me locked up in bed
Bill collectors say I'm in debt
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end
Had some money should've invest
Spent it all on stupid shit, yes
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end, yeah
Last year I was anxious, this year I'm a timebomb
Them pills never got to hang but
I take 'em when I need to find calm
I walk in with the same strut, even though I think my mind's gone
I sit here making strange cuts, waitin' for you to get my songs, and
I'm tryna live just like you do
I know these tendecies are not usual
But everytime I get in my head, I find I'm runnin' in the red
I wanna be that little kid again, bruh
I see him walkin' on the stage
He's 25 and fightin' to estrange from the lame
At 37 I'm so jaded I can't even aim
I'm feelin' that my mind is truly gone for good
You can find me locked up in bed
Bill collectors say I'm in debt
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end
Had some money should've invest
Spent it all on stupid shit, yes
Guess I probably could've been dead
Now I'm lookin' at my wit's end, yeah
Benjamin Miller, better known by his stage name Wrekonize, is an American underground rapper and current member of Miami band ¡Mayday!. He is currently signed to the record label Mayday Music, after previously being signed to Tech N9ne's Strange Music.
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