Te acuerdas, cabezón, de aquel gilipollas
Que abandonamos en marsella un buen día
Huyendo con su mujer en un paquebote griego
Víctima de pesadillas que al despertarse se cumplían.
Y te acuerdas de que jofre y maría
Con un continuará concluían la canción.
Profética ocurrencia. ayer en la boquería
Me tropecé con él y se cree que es de verdad.
De verdad como el filo gélido del cuchillo
Que me puso al cuello clamando sangre y venganza
Por los años desperdiciados, por los sufrimientos habidos,
Por haberlo dejado tirado en un puerto de francia.
Qué escándalo, cabezón... suerte que desde un puesto
Le tiraron un melón a la cabeza y petràs ¹
Le arreó un bolet ² y, con kilo y medio de dorada,
De rebote, siseta ¹ le reventó la nariz.
Ya más tranquilos, mojando pan en el capipota del pinotxo ¹,
Me confesó su calvario desde que
Su mujer, harta de ir de aquí para allá como locos
Y de velar pesadillas, se las piró también.
Que mientras tú, cabezón, disfrutabas de los placeres
De la vida engatusando a los del fisco y la banca,
Él no tuvo ni una noche ni un día de descanso...
Siempre en vilo, huyendo, mintiendo, sufriendo, haciendo trampas.
Preguntó por ti y le entró llorera
Al saber que habías muerto, que el corazón te había dicho basta.
Conmovido me abrazó diciendo: "ya sabes cómo era...
Un perro capaz de hacer lo que fuera por tocar los huevos".
Ahora lo tengo instalado en casa y dice que se queda
Hasta que prescriba el crimen o lo juzguen inocente
O cambiemos el final de la pesadilla por entregas
Y todo acabe bien, viento en popa y buen viaje.
Me suplanta en el espejo cuando me estoy afeitando.
Asoma la cabeza por el bidet cuando me aclaro los bajos.
Me endiña cada susto que me deja temblando.
Atraviesa las paredes, me revuelve los cajones.
Tienes que echarme una mano, que éste no está por hostias.
Te espero a cenar. te gustará el menú:
Tecamondres, peixín y marinet ³ de postre.
Si él ha podido volver, ¿por qué no tú, cabezón?
¿por que no tú?
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