2.
Le Gérontophile
Certains de nos congénères
Ont la manie bien singulière
De tomber bêt'ment amoureux
De plus jeun's qu'eux...
Quelques dangereux maniaques
Guident leurs ardeurs démoniaques
Vers les tendrons les jouvencelles
Et les pucelles...
Gamines, nubiles, novices
Sont l'objet de leurs sévices;
Ils font la sortie des lycées,
C'est insensé!
Cette irréparable offense
À la pureté de l'enfance,
Perpétrée par ces renégats
Fait du dégât...
Ce genre d'enfantillage,
C'est le doigt dans un engrenage...
Vis à vis du code pénal
Ça peut fair' mal...
De ce côté je suis tranquille,
Car moi je suis gérontophile:
La bonn'soupe est dans les vieux pots,
C'est mon topo!
Viens m 'aimer mémé, viens mémère!
Le temps fait du bien à l'affaire!
J'aim' ce grain d'sel dans tes cheveux!
Un petit examen s'impose:
Mignonne allons voir si l'arthrose
A point d'effets libidineux!
J'aim' les doyenn's, et les douairières,
Et les grisonn's, et les rombières,
Les femmes d'académiciens,
J'fais dans l'ancien...
Maisons de retraite, hospices,
Voilà des endroits propices:
On n'a qu'à l'ver le petit doigt,
On a le choix...
J'aurais, d'après les psychologues,
L'obsession de l'archéologue,
Le complexe du reliquaire,
De l'antiquaire...
Dans les cimetièr's, il y a des veuves,
Presque fraîches, presque neuves,
Qui tomb'raient la culott' de deuil
En un clin d'oeil!
Tant de soldats morts en campagne
Ont abandonné leurs compagnes
En panne sur la page trois
Du Kamasoutra...
Celles-là ne demandent qu'à nous suivre
Histoire de compulser le livre,
De l'dévorer jusqu'à plus faim,
Jusqu'au mot FIN...
Vivez, prenez de la bouteille,
Rev'nez quand vous serez bien vieille,
Ridée, décrépite, édentée,
Ça peut m'tenter...
La muette amplifie le geste
Pour montrer qu'elle a de beaux restes,
Et la sourde crie bien plus fort:
Encore, encore!
Madame, quel désir vous agite?
C'est le diable qui vous excite?
Non monsieur ce corps qui frissonne,
C'est Parlkinson...
Parfois ma déraison s'égare:
Je rêve de la perle rare
Qui aurait connu la maman
De Jeanne Calmant...
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