Après deux heures de queue
Par moins 24 degrés,
Je viens d'chopper un rhume,
J'ai les orteils gelés ;
J'avance comme je peux
Car c'est bientôt à moi,
Le bouton vert s'allume :
Ca y est je n'ai plus l'choix
Un gars me tend une perche
Qui s'envole aussitôt ;
Oh ! Non ! Raté, la dèche,
Je repars à zéro...
Tire-fesses, tire-fesses, tu me remplis de stresse,
Tire-fesses, tire-fesses, de Tignes à Super-Besse,
Tire-fesses, tire-fesses, quelle torture de SS
Tire-fesses, tire-fesses, je lance un SOS !
Mon tour revient enfin :
Onze heures, c'est pas trop tôt.
Je m'accroche au bazar,
4-3-2-1-0 !!!
Le choc me casse les reins,
Me luxe un testicule
Et l'truc, sans crier gare,
S'arrête et puis recule ;
J'suis déséquilibré
Et v'là la deuxième couche..
Le coup me fait valser,
J'ai d'la neige plein la bouche...
Je retente ma chance,
Je m'avoue pas vaincu.
Après quatre heures de queue,
Me v'la comme au début
Mais là, pas d'imprudence,
Je serre comme un malade ;
Tout se passe pour le mieux,
C'était d'la rigolade !
Ca y est, j'goûte au bonheur
Je regarde les sapins
Mais mon ski gauche -malheur-
Vient croiser son voisin...
Je vous passe les détails,
Toujours le même topo,
Je renfourche le barda
Et repars à l'assaut
Je siffle un air canaille
Pour faire le mec bien cool
Jusqu'à c'que devant moi
Un petit con s'écroule.
D'abord je me marre bien
Mais lui reste planté là,
" Vas-y dégage, gamin ! "
Et vlan ! Ca rate pas...
Une dernière tentative
Avant la fermeture
J'ai tenu 300 mètres,
Ca y est j'ai fait l'plus dur !
C'est bon je crois qu'j'arrive
J'aperçois le sommet
Franchement je dois l'admettre,
J'ai envie de pleurer...
Mes lèvres humides embrassent
La perche toute gelée ;
Je reste collé, hélas :
Je r'pars dans la vallée !!!
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